Casey has Faded

If the periods have a longer pause than the commas and are spaced throguhout the poem properly...(I've been reading poetry for years, and sometimes I still forget that pauses only ...

play the song over and over, listening to this woman, this perfect stranger, singing words to a song that showed me my life like it was a tear-streaked mirror ; ...

:oops: ...I knew that *lies* Thanks. And I'm not really from Claire Island, Ireland....That's where my history traces back to, so I put that up....you know, internet safety and all ...

I did see some commas *claps like mad* but you might need one or two full stops, and I don't suggest you put them aftera rhyming couplet.....unless there's no other ...

one major comment before I read it.... you really need commas and periods/puncuationin here. Unless this is for slam poetry and you plan on not taking a breath.... poetry is ...

sorry I commented back like this, but I take my poetry very personally, and this poem perticular. thank you for the comments, though.....and sorry about the typos....bad habit.

worms and cars.... have you ever noticed that when it rains,worms come up from the ground? well, I remember in third grade we used to yell at the bus driver ...

timeless is used as a analogy/illusion/metaphor (sp?).....I forget which. timless is solid,unchangable, like statues..... and from our birth asa statue to when the clay has dried, we complain and we ...

and thanks for the warm welcome

I got used to it after fictionpress.com. While Flamers are usually ignored by most of the site, there is one group of friends that go around insulting everyone, and they ...

I agree, the full stops don't work for this poem. You could add a lot more detail as well, but it is a good, solid start. best of luck.

Thank you for all your help!

I read over the basic rules, and I've done this sort of thing before....but if I break any, feel free to Flame me

Okay, now I noticed the title and I can tell why this poem seemed full of 'open air' to me. okay, sorry to bother you...

It reminded me of a not-so-nice comment about poetry I read in Stephen King's "On Writing"..... Don't get me wrong, the poem really does sound interesting. The poem just isn't ...